


Falling in Love is Hard on the Knees

by NotEvenCloseToStraight



Series: Playlist [15]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, The Amazing Spider-Man (Movies - Webb), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Blow Jobs, Dumb boys being dumb, Falling In Love, Hooking up, Hurt Peter Parker, Inappropriate Humor, M/M, Spideypool - Freeform, Wade Wilson Loves Peter Parker, terrible flirting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-15
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-12 15:00:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28762203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NotEvenCloseToStraight/pseuds/NotEvenCloseToStraight
Summary: Blow jobs turn to love because this is Spideypool
Relationships: Peter Parker/Wade Wilson
Series: Playlist [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1462534
Comments: 12
Kudos: 327





	Falling in Love is Hard on the Knees

**[YOU KNOW THE SONG!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMKuEim-ywk) **

“Go easy on a fella.” Wade was laughing as Peter shoved him into a dark corner, laughing as the world’s best web slinger yanked at his pants. “To be honest, I thought you’d be less enthusiastic about losing our bet. You’re the most competitive person I know but my _god_ are you grabby right now.”

“Wade.” Peter huffed when he found unexpected buttons on Wade’s rather spandex outfit. “D’ya really think I would’ve agreed to a bet with _mouth stuff_ as the wager if I wasn’t going to be into it?”

“I’ll be real honest with you, Spidey.” Wade wiggled his hips a little to encourage Peter to keep going. “You keep talking about being into mouth stuff with me and you might not need your mouth at all. I’ll be up and done in my pants _real_ quick.”

“You’re stupid and my knees are gonna start hurting soon so why don’t you shut the hell up and whip it out?” Peter sat back on his heels and leveled the Merc with a _look_. “Why do you have buttons on here anyway?”

“To protect my virtue of course.” Wade undid the buttons with a quick twist, and then almost died when Peter actually _licked_ at his lips. “Even though I’m rapidly deciding ‘to hell with my virtue’ and maybe let’s see what them lips do.”

“I’m gonna tell you I hate you now before my mouth is full, kay?”

“Yep, sounds about right.”

************

“You lose.” Peter wasn’t laughing so much as he was gasping for air, bent over double and wheezing as he tried to catch his breath after that last stunt. “Wade, you lose. And also next time? Let’s not bet on things that involve city buses, alright? That wasn’t fun, it was terrifying.”

“You know what they say--exhilaration makes everything better.” Wade tore off his gloves and tossed them aside, went to his knees on the gravel and reached for Peter’s butt to drag him in close. “Drop Trou baby boy, show me everything that Spandex does a real terrible job of hiding.”

“Maybe we should--” Peter tossed his head back and hissed out a breath when Wade tore open a packet of lube and wrapped a slick hand around him. “Maybe we should talk for a minute about how we went from a game of truth or dare to hinging bets on blow jobs.”

“You wanna talk about that now?” Wade raised non existent eyebrows. “Right now when I’ve got my hand on your business, my knees on what is probably broke glass and am about to show you how weirdly long my tongue is?”

“Your tongue is weirdly long?”

“Boy _Howdy_ are you about to find out.”

***************

It was rooftops. It was alleyways. It was ducking behind a corner and honest to God clapping both hands over their mouth while the other one went down and _down_ so they wouldn’t scream. It was bets about who could eat the biggest burrito and laughing when the loser complained about how deep throating the burrito had been easier than deep throating the….

_Well anyway._

It was late nights that were basically early mornings spent side by side fighting crime and then early mornings that were damn near sunrise that were spent arguing and teasing and betting in ways that guaranteed both of them won, both of them were grinning, both of them were trying hard to ignore the spark that lit up in their damn _souls_ because at some point just the mouth stuff turned into something like heart stuff and neither one was ready to do anything about that.

It was exhilaration after capturing a baddie that turned into almost tender touches, it was fury and anger over botched jobs and near death experiences that translated to needy and grasping and _rough_. Sometimes there was still blood on their hands when the pants came off, sometimes a gasped, “You’re so bad.” when Wade snapped and did something he shouldn’t but Peter couldn't find it in himself to care, and sometimes an accidentally muttered, “I love you” when Wade couldn’t keep his mouth shut anymore

But when Peter gaped up at him, the merc corrected, “Bea Arthur. Love me some Bea Arthur, absolutely frootly that’s definitely who I’m picturing right now.”

“You’re gonna tell me you love me, then call me someone else’s name?” Peter licked his fingers, licked the mess from the corner of his lips and rolled his eyes. “And here I thought it was Cupid calling.”

It was all that and more, soulmates finding each other and not being willing to put it all together quite yet, heart mates finding matches and too scared to worry about what it meant, messy enthusiastic _stolen_ moments they tried to pretend were just moments and not seconds that tallied up to be hours and days and weeks spent at each others side and tangled in each others arms and breathing in each others scent until it was all they could think about.

It was all that, and then one day Peter almost died and Wade went to his knees for a totally different reason, crumpled to the ground over Peter’s body and gathered the kid up into his arms, prayed to whichever deity he could think of, begged the stars and karma and all the good vibes in the world to save Peter because _no no no_ he couldn’t live without him but more than that Wade couldn’t live with _himself_ if he knew he didn’t do everything necessary to save the man he loved.

“I’ll get on my knees every damn day for you.” Wade swore, and it was a stupid promise but he meant it from his soul. “I don’t care how bad it is for my joints or how often you get that fucking dumb smirk when you finally feel taller than me, I’ll do it Pete. Alleys or roof tops or-- or whatever. We don’t even have to bet anymore. I’ve been saving a good one that involves the Statue of Liberty but I’ll cancel it if you just open your eyes. Come on. I mean, I wanna tell you what the bet is anyway cos you’ll think it’s cool but I won’t make you do it, I promise. Pete come on. Come on.”

“Gonna make you--” whisper soft and way too weak, and Wade bit back a sob when Peter cracked an eye at him. “--kneel on some goddamn cactus-- pay me back for this.”

“I’ll get you off while kneeling on a cactus, sure.” Wade answered quickly, words shaking with a surge relief he couldn’t quite seem to hide. “Promise."

“Like ten times.”

“Ten times.” he tried for a smile. “Hell Pete, even my super penis can’t get it up ten times in a row. Why don’t we try for a well rounded half-dozen.” 

“Fine.” Peter wheezed a little and clutched at his side where the bleeding was only barely starting to slow. “But you gotta swallow.”

“Literally gallons.” Wade promised. “Turn it on till my cup overfloweth, baby boy.” 

Finally finally something of a laugh from Peter, little more than a chuckle that trailed off into a grimace. “Fuck me, you’re dumb.” 

“Yeah.” Wade swallowed hard and cradled the web slinger up into his arms carefully carefully. “Yeah, I’m real fuckin’ dumb. Are you alright, Pete? Gonna make it?”

“I need some stitches, but you can do that for me.” Peter pushed his forehead into Wade’s shoulder and tried to exhale, breath hitching over a half pained sob. “You-you got me?”

“Holy shit, I’ve got you.” Wade sat back onto his heels, then onto his butt, holding Peter up close. “Not gonna let you go, okay? I’ve got you.”

“Thanks.” Peter was drifting in and out of consciousness, exhausted and hurting but all too happy to be held by his Merc. “...Wade?”

“Yeah, sugar buns?”

“...I love you.”

“Damn.” Wade’s entire body shuddered, his heart clenching. “Pete I--”

“Falling in love with you was hell on my knees.” Peter murmured. “But worth it. Dunno how we’re gonna make the love story sound good when it revolved around blow jobs but we’ll figure it out, right?”

“Uh right.” Wade nodded and smoothed Peter’s hair back from his forehead. “We’ll figure it out. I love you too, Pete.”

“I know.” Peter smiled just the tiniest bit. “You said it on BJ number two and you’re such a terrible liar, not even the Bea Arthur story could cover it up.”

“It’s hard to lie convincingly when I’m eight inches deep--”

“--you’re six inches at the most.”

“--now is _not_ the time to have that argument, Pete.”

“I love you.” Peter laughed again and went limp, trusting in Wade’s arms. “Maybe we could just kiss a little bit instead of doing mouth stuff for right now?”

“Sounds good to me.”


End file.
